A common occurrence for some of us, it’s the biggest means of my relations becoming complicated.
I’d suggest you take some time to explore your own part in this. You’ve chosen to spend time with people who behave this way, and you feel forced into doing things you don’t want to do. But you aren’t under their control. Nobody is forcing you to do anything. Their choices are theirs. You can always choose to step away from the drama.
You side with the one you agree with.
That has never happened to me.
Lucky.
Tell them to get their shit together or ditch both until they do. Just don’t get involved. Just tell both you’re not interested in that kinda shit and straight out refuse to talk about any of it if either brings it up.
EDIT: Source: Been there plenty of times, if they learn that you’re absolutely not influenced in either direction they’ll leave you alone with their shit. You can still be friends with them, just whenever that shit comes up completely refuse to even listen.
prolly why i dont have any friends
I’ll be your friend.
“A common occurrence”? Wtf? This hasn’t happened once to me.
Let’s just say the friends I’ve come to connect to aren’t very well off in their personal lives.
Happened to me once when two of my friends started dating and then had a nasty breakup. Thankfully they didn’t involve me in it, worst that happened was one of them did complain about the other to me but it didn’t devolve into full on shittalking thankfully, and I just told them point blank I’m still friends with their ex and while their frustrations are valid, I’m not comfortable with them venting to me. We’re all adults so that’s where it ended and I’m still friends with both! I don’t think they ever made up but I also don’t feel it’s my place to ask lol it’s been years at this point so it’s just water under the bridge
If this keeps happening to you I’m afraid you need better friends. Unless the reason they’re fighting is due to something serious (assault, robbery, discrimination, etc.) there’s no reason they should involve you. I know it can be hard to be harsh with people you care about, but sometimes the best thing you can do for someone is to tell them to grow up lol, sometimes people need to watch all their bridges burn before they realise they’re the one that needs to change
