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On my dads computer, back in the day, I set the sound for every action in Windows to a silly song i downloaded off kazaa (Windows xp days, i believe)
So this was the sound that played for clicking the start menu, hovering over programs/apps, whatever it was and making that menu appear, and any sub menu for individual games or apps following that. Any kind of prompt like errors or “are you sures” etc, minimising/maximising a window. Everything!
That’s what my virus would do. I just need the perfect sound to apply. Maybe that annoying tiktok song “Oh no! Oh no! Oh no no no no no!”
Every time you log in, maximize a window, lock your PC, etc, your desktop icons randomly arrange themselves by penis. Open a folder, forced to display files as icons and arranged by penis. Try to view all your open windows on your desktop, you guessed it, penis.
No, no, change it back! I had internet explorer at the tip of penis
Chip, you can’t arrange by penis
Just change it back okay
For those who haven’t seen the masterpiece:
The whole thing is worth the watch but the reference is at (about) 7:50
A screamer virus could bring the world to its knees.
I was in college during the years leading up to y2k and supported myself at the time getting IT infrastructure ready. Some friends and I decided to write a “virus” that, on bootup, checks to see if the current date is in the first week of January 2000 and if it is and a backup of the fonts is not found (so it’ll only run once) then it’ll back up your fonts and alter the originals to replace the y character with the k. This affected everything system wide.
That created more chaos than anticipated.
kou know, to this dak i alwask wondered whk my computer alwaks did that. kou wilk rascal, kou!
I’m sorry, I don’t speak Dutch.
Kanker lekker
sounds like something I’d see on dancoot1
We used to edit the system keymapping on the school Macintoshes and duplicate a letter somewhere, and then we’d do the same to a second machine using the letter that the first could no longer type; then we’d switch the physical keycaps
y2k
replace the y character with the k
I see what you did there
I’m dumb and/or stoned. Can you explain please? Shk gkpsk, slklk, sprklk, trkst bk mk crkpt?
Y to k Y 2 k
Koure missing an a in sparklk
Mk bad tkvm
I used to make a batch file that opened a command prompt that opened the batch file again and again and put it on the computers as the internet Explorer logo.
People would get so mad when they opened it as a cascade of cmd would open until the computer crashed
So something like that i think
Sounds like a weak fork bomb.
In a programming class, one of my professors sometimes remolety opened the xeyes program (Linux program that opens a pair of eyes that follow your cursor) on students that were not paying a lot of attention.
Thank you, I have wondered why xeyes existed for the last 28 years.
I used to operate a dashboard on a wall-monitor in an IT ops center. For Halloween, I wrote a script that very briefly played a video of a creepy set of eyes that opened, looked around the room, focused on something/glared, then closed, all over around like 2 seconds, but ran 1-3 times an hour. It was funny the first few times it happened and I got told to turn it off.
Instead I changed it to run 1-3 times a year.
My manager thought that that was absolutely hilarious without being too disruptive and let me keep it. We had enough turnover that there was always a newbie in the pool and every now and then, someone would say ‘what the fuck was that!?’ and we’d get a good laugh.
I used to do the same thing to a few people back in the day. Linux distros used to ship with the X listening port just conveniently wide open and the config set to allow input from any other device on the LAN. I’d start with only one xeyes, and then they’d close it. I’d do it a few more times until they got irritated with me, and then I’d push it further by putting xeyes into a bash loop to open dozens at a time.
How about a programm which screams “aaaaaaa” after you unlock your screen. Barely hearable at first and it gets louder with every minute. People who don’t know how to remove it would have to lock and unlock their screens every 5 minutes or so.
Supposedly there was a DOS virus that would spawn a pacman that would eat your letters as you typed them.
Two options come to mind.
A virus that adjusts your mouse sensitivity by like 5% every time you unlock your computer. Just enough that existing muscle memory is off, so you either have to adjust to the change or change it back every time.
A virus that installs and/or sets a similar but not quite right keyboard layout, and swaps to it randomly few boots. For example, setting the keyboard to Canadian Multilingual Standard instead of US English, where its only some of the punctuation keys that are changed.
I swear my old computer already had that keyboard virus. POS was constantly trying to type French at me.
You are fucking devious. Mouse sensitivity/acceleration curve is my largest ‘minor annoyance’ between various machines/operating systems. Having that change on me randomly without changing systems would really mess with me.
I have made some silly programs. One that moved the mouse pointer one pixel left, then down, right and up. It was quite annoying. Another that moved the mouse pointer when you reached the edge of the screen, touching the rightmost pixel row would move it to the left side of the screen and vice versa, same thing with top and bottom.
You basically invented the endless desktop functionality, lol
I Rick Rolled my entire school this way. Write a program that maxed the volume and held it there at 100%, minimised all open windows, downloaded a photo of Rick Astley and set it as your wallpaper, then started playing Never Gonna Give You Up. The only way to stop it was to power off the computer or wait the song out, then manually fix your wallpaper.
I saved the executable in a publically accessible location on the school’s server that I shouldn’t have had write access to, and sent a cleverly disguised link to a mate. He thought it was hilarious, and forwarded the email to a dozen of his mates. They forwarded it to all their mates, and pretty soon no teacher could go 60 seconds without another one of their students’ laptops interrupting the class at max volume.
Best bit? I “taught a valuable lesson in cybersecurity” and didn’t get in (much) trouble!!
I’m still irritated about when I was a youth I found a somewhat obvious security hole, and took advantage of it in a mildly funny way, the staff just punished me.
You weren’t supposed to be able to change the desktop background, but for some reason MS Paint had a “set to background” option that worked. So I set the background to a screenshot of the desktop, and then hid all the icons and start menu. Later, the teacher thought the computer was broken because “nothing was working”.
I think it could’ve been a good teaching moment. A talk about not messing shared resources up, and channel my interests somewhere productive. Nope. Just a lecture and week long library ban. Disappointed.
I created something really similar, but instead it was a random shock site. Also, some files stayed in between sessions and some other students put DOTA executables there. We replaced that executable with the virus 😈
Autohotkey script that shuts the system down whenever someone types out certain key words. They of course include words related to looking up the issue like “help”, “randomly”, “virus” and so on. Not the most sophisticated but one I’ve actually done before.
Oooh, that’s evil. You don’t even need administrator privileges for that IIRC.
As long as ahk can be installed and the autostart folder isn’t locked it will work
back when I was in school someone wrote a script that just openened the optical drive at random intervals and put it in the Autostart of every PC in the Comouter room
Uhh, it was “Hey everybody, I’m looking at gay porno!” and then it proceeded to spawn hundreds of internet exploder windows pointing at goatse.cx. Thank God I was at home, alone, when it got me.
Yup, was gonna say the same thing. I liked the enthusiasm of the Hey Everybody guy!
In the early 90s there was a virus going around that made the floppy drive’s loading noises play the Imperial March.
No wonder people here keep talking about how awesome 90s internet was.
No, you don’t understand.
The virus was distributed on a floppy disk with the Empire’s logo printed on the label.90s was wild
How about 512 floppy drives, 16 hard drives and 4 scanners?
