- cross-posted to:
- programmer_humor@programming.dev
- cross-posted to:
- programmer_humor@programming.dev
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My buddy once had an epic hydroponic set up going in his garage. One day the garage door went up for some reason. Guess someone saw it and called the cops. They went full on raid of his garage only to find some of the best fucking vegetables in the city. He said they were actually visibly upset that he only had veggies
That’s terrifying. Those stupid cops will kill your baby with a flashbang, shoot your dog and then murder you becauese you were holding the TV remote during their veggie raid.
Even if he really was growing some pot plants, it shouldn’t even be a big deal.
“No fruits???”
It still blows my mind that a plant is illegal. One with medicinal uses, no less. What will they think of next? Banning sunshine?
If black people like the sun too much, probably.
Just ftr: Everyone uses drugs about equally. They just arrest Black people disproportionately for it.
True, but specifically USA targeted black people to fill their prisons with slave labor. Crack to this day is still treated much worse than cocaine despite the insane multiplier having been lowered.
Or if sunshine starts competing with wood pulp for paper manufacturing.
Fucking carrots??
Hah! Best comment I’ve ever seen
LoL, this just reminded me of the movie “Shoot 'em Up” with Clive Owen’s character being a stone cold badass while munching on carrots he grows in his garage.
BTW, though it is a cartoonishly ridiculous action flick, “Shoot 'em Up” is a terrifically fun movie to watch.
Thank you for the recommendation, I know I love him as an actor, but mostly because I only know his character in the Sin City movie
sllllurrrrrrrrrrrrrrpppp
exaggerated: Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Not weed, but I was going to HS prom in the 80’s and my date had a bottle of sparkling grape juice she showed me when we parked. 3 cop cars came out of nowhere, zoomed up and got us out of the car. I was laughing knowing it was non alcoholic. But the look on the cops faces was priceless. Just total disappointment. They all had to look at the bottle just to make sure. Hadn’t thought about that in years until your comment.
Cops get pissed when their hunches are wrong because they still believe the hunch, they just think you got away with it
ACAB
Botanists? BSD admins?
No, Bastard (Operators from Hell).
Hopefully that checks out, even though it’s an old reference.
(Also, agree with the original expression of the negative systemic evaluation of the US policing system, even if I don’t love the crude expression; and even though I’m contributing in a humourous satire of the expression)
I remember being around 12 years old on the early Internet and finding those and reading a bunch of them
Is generating binaural beats that get you high using my own AI setup technically a drug operation? 🤔
Cheese it!!
There definitely have been a case where the police, observing things with thermal cameras from a helicopter (for it is in the US where this tale happened), observed some house with a highly suspicious heat signature. …Some dude’s crypto mining operation.
Well, that was definitely indirectly drug related.
ik there’s a lot of drug money in crypto but the majority of it isn’t that. Bitcoin didn’t get a 2.1 trillion dollar market cap though selling weed, a ton of that is from institutions like banks and corporation buying it up
In a way it sorta did. Not directly obviously but if you look at the history of bitcoin, its first truly viable use was darknet markets. After getting established as the currency there, it proved it could work and banks n all started buying it, so it was the weed that did it in a way
First ever bitcoin purchase was literally pizza lol
I didn’t say anything abt the first purchase so unsure how this is relevant
Edit: excerpt
Silk Road proved the market for secure anonymous transactions based on blockchain ledgers, and the viability of cryptocurrency in general. Before the Silk Road marketplace, Bitcoin was mainly a novelty, with the first Bitcoin transaction famously being 10,000 BTC for 2 pizzas. Shortly after the Silk Road darknet market took off, Bitcoin reached $266 per coin, and the Silk Road marketplace became a $200 million operation.
In theory it’s supposed to be unconstitutional to use FLIR on a house without a warrant to find evidence. In practice though, I’m sure they can easily ruin someone’s life for a while based off of “heat signatures”. This isn’t even mentioning what they could get away with if the Feds are involved. Who even knows anymore?
Can’t use it to find evidence or get a warrant, but absolutely do use it to figure out who to target/where to look for evidence.
Herring Vs. United States set the de facto legal basis that allows for this sort of evidence laundering.
No, I just have kids… Kids that don’t turn ANYTHING OFF!!! I’m OK.
What using a lot of electricity is a crime, which lets a judge sign off on a warrant, now?
They can dream up any nonsense and slap it on a warrant, so it’s not really that big of a hindrance to get one. They can get one for a different person at a different address, still come shoot you in your own home and walk away with a paid vacation.
Plot Twist: Servers are full of websites about how to grow weed, selling weed and weed-recipes.
Worst that’s happened to me is that I was detained and questioned by the cops while they investigated my “grow operation”. I had some old school grow lights in my kitchen window for my window sill plants and a potted hibiscus outside on my deck.
It’s sad that the cops couldn’t immediately tell the difference between hibiscus and weed nor were they aware that people can grow indoor house plants under those pink/purple fluorescent lights which for sure wouldn’t be strong enough to grow marijuana to begin with.
It’s also funny that my neighbor at the time actually was growing weed on his front patio, and they never seemed to notice in the 5 or so years I lived next door.
This is because “The Drug War” is just a device for political persecution of the people that whoever is in power wants to harass or outright remove. It’s the Nixon Playbook and it’s not just Republicans who use it.
It’s more basic than that as well. Cops assume that if you arent hiding something then it’s fine. In a very real sense cops are looking for criminals not crimes. If you act like they think criminals do they’re going to be a pain in your ass at best and possibly even pressure you into confessing to crimes because “they know a criminal when they see one”.
But the inverse is also true. If you break the law while acting like you have every right to do what it is you’re doing, you can often get away with it so long as the cops aren’t tipped off. Someone owns that bike, some people lose the keys to their locks, if someone isn’t hiding that theyre cutting a bike lock most of the time that person owns the bike, and if they confidently say it’s their bike, it’s not like a cop is going to check or even have a way to check unless somethings off (unless they think you look like a criminal). A potted plant in the front yard is the same.
Reminds me of the story of the people working on running a business in their apartment, for whatever Linux distro it was, in the 2000s that was caught and had to move the servers for obvious reasons.
Do you snort, smoke or inject kubernetes?
Jack in with your personal link.
Duh, it’s a cloud, you inhale it.
ba-dum tss
You plug it in
Bender, have you been jacking on?
I’ve always called it boofing.
Kubernetes sounds like an awfuly strange strain of weed.
with your help we can have a cannabis cultivar called kubernetes, only the sky is the limit (and electricity bills)
If you’re doing it right you’ve got plenty of pods.
Kubernetes?
Tank you!
Uh i didn’t know you could grow servers. I assumed they were assembled in factories, being machines and all.
Does anybody have experience with this process? Where do you get the seeds from? What soil do they grow in? Should you water them, or not (considering them being machines and all)? Do they need sunlight exposure? And if yes, how much of it?
Being kernels i assume it’s akin to corn propagation
They grow in high-silicate soil.
I’m no expert but I heard you can compile the kernels to grow them yourself
Only the certified organic servers are grown. Usually hydroponics are involved as the soil tends to jam the coolers. Sunlight is only necessary if they’re solar powered.
I had the opposite happen one time. Our provider came out to check our electric meter because our usage dropped significantly when we had our old AC replaced. They thought we were stealing power and came back a aecond time to double check.
