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At one point, I was in a couples’ therapy session and I had recently been diagnosed with cystic fibrosis. I realized (and said) in that session that I would never have a break again. Vacation from work? Still have cystic fibrosis to deal with.
Joke’s on them. Ignoring it is the easy part. Guilt doesn’t help. Meds do.
Meanwhile, constant anxiety kills you young. Imagine being so obsessed with being useful that you don’t live long enough to pull it off.
taking meds so my anxiety is controlled enough for me to procrastinate till the last minute
Its sad how well this life-hack works, until it doesn’t. IME, of course.
I don’t see it that way. If there’s always something you have to be doing, then that’s the life you chose. Yeah, there’s some things that are usually necessary. Your job will take a third, sleep another third and the rest is up to you to decide. If the remaining third is spent doing things you don’t like doing the majority of the time, then change it.
My life is fucking boring, but I can say I spend my third doing exactly what I want. There’s odd things in there that come along and take time away but they aren’t a constant. Want to live this life? Say no, do less, chill more. Life is what you make it.If the remaining third is spent doing things you don’t like doing the majority of the time, then change it.
“I would simply not be poor.”
I have to say, there is an established solution to this problem: having a functional and comminicative extended family/social network. Car trouble? Your uncle and cousin can help you fix it tomorrow. Paying rent/mortgage? Not when you live in the big family home with 3 other generations of people that’s been paid off for the last 50 years. Cooking dinner? Grandma and aunt Bethel do it every night with help from the kids. Doing your taxes? Family friend Joe is an accountant and is glad to answer a few simple questions for you.
Unfortunately, most peoples’ families are annoying as fuck.
I come from a culture where multigenerational homes are a thing and me and my partner have done the unthinkable to break free from it. We have been shunned and ostricized for not following on the traditional way and as painful as it can be I will not subject my child to the burden of it. I know that te dream of having a solo home is that for many, just a dream, but multigenerational homes are a different kind of hell.
Unfortunately, most peoples’ families are annoying as fuck.
People are generally annoying. The trick is to remember that you are also people, and to handle the eccentricities of others with grace.
Mormons, eh?
Yeah dude, the most important part about chilling is shutting off the worry tap and fully ignoring it for a while
You were brainwashed to think that you are supposed to be hyper individualistic - you arent.
Nobody on their death bed ever wishes they’d spent more time working.
That Titan Sub guy probably had a millisecond of “Oops, probably should have revisited hull integrity one more time” regret.
I feel like thinking this just speaks to the level of dysfunction with which we were raised. We are taught that the point of life is to go do things or drive a car or watch Netflix. The point of life is to survive and reproduce. Everything else is supposed to be secondary.
https://developers.cloudflare.com/cache/reference/csam-scanning/
ehm why was the photo flagged as csam by cloudflare??
i’m from Italy, is this an eu thing?
edit: ok if i open the post from lemmy.world the image is there, so maybe is a lemmy.zip thing?
I think its a .zip thing. Unlike you I can see this particular post for some reason, but most images are currently blocked with the same error for me. Even thumbnails of news articles are blocked, not just images uploaded directly to Lemmy.
country music talked about that years ago … I still enjoy quoting an old song from Hank Williams from the 1940s
“I’ll never get out of this world alive!”
Would’ve been ironic if Hank Williams had later become an astronaut.
I think several of the astronaut crews were fans of Hank Williams … I pretty sure one of them played this tune while floating in space looking down at the earth.
If you do getsome time off, you can always fill it with worries and anxieties!
As a wise meme I saw the other day stated, worrying about things works: 95% of the things I worry about never happen!
Meh, not really. Things to sort out come in batches and are spread out.
For me the surprising thing about adulting was how many exams there are. I genuinely believed that once I got my degree I would be done with studying for exams but no, there’s always another one to pass. Language exams, professional certifications, license exams for different hobbies. This shit never ends.
I graduated almost 15 years ago and have never taken another exam lol
Maybe it’s just me then :(
The neat part is that “chilling” is one of the things you need to put on that to-do list and make time for too!
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If anyone figures that one out, please let me know.
I’m so tired of being tired for things that I need or want to be awake for. Work presentation? can’t sleep. Road trip? can’t sleep. Concert? can’t sleep. It’s not even always negative anxiety: That thing I’m excited about tomorrow afternoon? up.all.night.
I can self-medicate to a degree, but even that is hit or miss. I used to caffeinate myself to get through these, but have cut things like coffee since the pandemic and now only very rarely use them.
Same, the cycle is awful…
The only thing that let’s me get enough sleep on one day is having not nearly enough the day before.
Then there’s the battle of mental health good if going to bed early, waking up early, assuming i can sleep, versus having a social life.
Mindfulness meditation. It’s practice for being okay with taking time away from the things.
ouch. I’m reading this while chilling.
BIG chillin over here. I’ve discovered that giving myself at least one day every other week of mandatory not giving a fuck actually makes me fare more able to deal with the shit that needs to be dealt with the rest of the time.
For me it’s Sunday. Mon-Fri is work, Saturday is chores, Sunday is big chillin. (Except things like taking out the trash and whatnot of course)
I’ve had a weird arc. A number of months after I graduated college and started working, it finally sunk in that there wasn’t always something I needed to be studying or working on, as had been the case for like my whole academic career. I had a job that I wasn’t allowed to do outside the plant, so when I went out the gates I was done. Over the years I got promoted to positions of more and more responsibility and, even though I tried hard to keep work and home separate, at some point it was unavoidable and there was always something I needed to be doing, always emails I should be answering.
Then, after 40 years, I retired earlier this year. I had a lot to go through with selling a house and stuff, but it’s just starting to get to the point where I don’t have something I need to be doing, as had happened 40 years ago.
I think that’s a pretty normal arc. You work your butt off to get through school, then when you start working, and you have limited responsibilities, you don’t really ever work outside of work. As you become more senior, you will have more to do than can be done in the ~8 hours during the day, M-F and you start feeling like you need to work while you’re at home or whatever.
Then when you retire, every thing falls away.
I probably won’t get to retire, so, I’ll never get there. I’m glad you get to experience that again.
I just dropped from a lead position to non-lead because of this. The only work time is office time+travel for work. Outside of that work does not exist.
That’s a big quality of life change. I wasn’t super enthused about going up the chain for a long time, but then found I really enjoyed the strategic planning and organizational stuff, so went up a couple levels of management. The money was a quality of life change, too, of course.
Eh. I could make more at work but the that stuff doesn’t drive me, actually triggers severe burn out. I have a savings/debt paydown/investment strategy that gets me where I need to go.
It was also a company switch to one with stability, steady raises, better benefits, and more interesting work. So while it’s a significant trade off in salary, quality of life is vastly improved.
It for sure sounds like the right decision for you. And to be sure I was clear, when I eventually went up a leadership ladder, I was more motivated by the job than by the money, it’s just that the money was nice too. I was at the same company for just short of 40 years. I moved around some within the company to keep things interesting, and then realized my experience would be pretty useful for strategic leadership, and that I’d enjoy that kind of thing.
I think that makes sense. Having stability in life is going to be a different world tbh. 20-40yrs is a long time in personal development
