Coworker. I told him to fuck off with his conspiracy bullshit. But back when I patronized him, one thing he said was that he didn’t consider belief a binary as in that you either believe something or don’t. He viewed all beliefs as a continuum. You can believe one thing 10% and another thing 90%, but he wouldn’t let me pin him down as to whether he “believed” any particular thing or not.
All while trying to convince me “tall white aliens” run the U.S. government and Sandy Hook was faked by a bunch of actors and the U.S. military had invisibility technology and planes that aren’t dumping weather-controlling chemicals don’t leave trails in the sky. Pretty standard QAnon-level bullshit. But if I asked him if he believed any of those things, he wouldn’t answer. Honestly, it makes sense as a dishonest rhetorical tactic.
Dude also literally drinks borax in his juice cleanse drink.
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This one is gomna break you brains:
Y’all heard of the “Great Replacement” unhinged conspiracy theory?
Imagine that, but Han Chinese Edition.
Context: My family was born in PRC
My older brother told me the CCP is conspiring to… wait for it
Replace Han Chinese with ethnic minorities and “African Migrants”… 🤨
Yea his brain is totally cooked.
Might be lead poisoning or some other weird shit in China.
He hates racism, yet simultaneously believes in a racial hierarchy. 🤨
(of course, he believes Han Chinese are on top 🤨)
Oh did I forget to say, we live in the US.
Why is he so worried about China, a country he no longer has citizenship in… 🤨
He believes in Han Supremacy but became a US Citizen? 🤨
(Sorry for the 🤨 emoji, its just so… bewildering)
Also, doesn’t like vaccines, but still caved in and got a tetnaus vaccine when he stepped on a nail. Yes he know its a vaccine, but apparantly, if your risk of dying is high enough, survival instincts overrules conspiracy theories? 🤔
A Chinese person I know believes that Jews control the entire world. Even China was controlled by the Jews until Xi Jinping came along and tried to throw off the yoke. Apparently, the hooked nose is a dead giveaway for spotting Jews.
Fortunately, she is mostly isolated (by her own choice, she has a vehicle and plenty of time and money to socialize if she wants) aside from communicating online.
She also told me that the Mexican government had been taken over by Freemasons in the 1800s and become extremely hostile to the Catholic Church. Priests were killed or driven out of the country, monasteries and convents were closed, and Church property was forfeited to the state.
Actually, to my greatest astonishment, that last paragraph is completely true. Look up anti-clericalism in Mexico. The remnants of these anti-clerical laws were only removed from the Mexican constitution in 1992.
Two weeks ago.
California’s reservoirs are empty and couldn’t fight the fires because of democrats.
You can log into a website to see the realtime water levels. They are nearly full and have been. They are also above average levels.
A friend of mine was a Nazi and believed that Jews controlled lots of stuff. He believed that they were trying to destroy white people through race mixing and therefore made the country take in more immigrants. He’s getting treatment in prison now.
I got a Nazi friend too, believes all that whacky shit. The whackiest conspiracy theory that he believes is that his brown ass is Aryan and that Hitler wouldn’t have killed him if given the chance.
Are you sure he’s a friend?
Weird that you have Nazi friends. I have idiot friends, but no Nazis.
Yeah, if i found a friend was a nazi, I would have 1 less friend.
I mean, that’s pretty much where I’m at. Probably should have specified that my friend became a Nazi, not the other way around.
And is now an ex-friend?
A440 was developed by the Nazis because it is harmonically dissonant and causes disorder and chaos as it is incongruous with people’s natural frequency. A432 is the ‘natural’ tuning system.
As someone who went to college for music theory, it was hilarious hearing this
Yeah, I remember when my step dad has a period he believed this. He would find ways to tune music back to how it’s “supposed” to sound. Everything sounded horribly out of tune, but he’d just say it’s because we’ve all become so used to listening to music the “bad” way.
Electricity from nuclear power plants is radioactive and that’s why people get cancer.
I suppose it is made of beta particles.
I read a lof of conspiracy nutcakery for entertainment, this one is new to me. Thanks!
I have one some say is interesting.
There’s this author I’ve enjoyed, in a way where you could call her an idol of mine. She wrote a few books I liked and I knew she went by a certain name and so I looked her up in a user directory based on this just as a way to entertain myself. Sent a request to be friends. The response was “request sent” and I was like “hehehehe, there’s a really small chance that’s her”.
A week later I got a response and almost shat myself. But we talked and talked and soon she invited me to a few of her social circles. I accepted. And… one of them is a flat earther club.
I definitely don’t mind and don’t judge. We’re still strong friends, we talk every day, and I’m a VIP in their social circle (I feel honored), but she’s big on that stuff and there’s a big discussion every now and then on the shape of the Earth, and it’s an… interesting experience. So I just sit on the sidelines as the one woman who silently disagrees with the Earth being flat.
It’s concave.it’s concavelmao this really got me.
Like everyone here in have stories but instead of adding to the pile may I offer a simple solution. I tell people who fall this stuff to make a list and post it on their fridge. If just one of them turns out to be true they can call me up and rub it in my face. There are two reasons I suggest this. First, the people in the media who push this stuff keep a steady flow of BS incoming. They put out a new one to distract from the last one. Second, back in 2011 I realized it’s like a cult and I did a little looking into what it takes to get people to snap out of it. The expert I found said there is nothing you can do, folks have to reach their own conclusions. Should any of your friends come around just let it go, don’t make a big deal about it.
If just one of them turns out to be true they can call me up and rub it in my face.
I tried something somewhat like this once.
He’d constantly be like “something big is coming very soon, just wait.” And I kept pressing him for “due dates”. Like by what date are you 99% sure “it” (like, official announcements that ETs have been living among us disguised as humans since the 60s or whatever) will have happened? Because if he gives a date, I can finally nail him down and say “hey, so, you were wrong, see? The incorrectness of your prediction is some amount of disconfirming evidence right?”
So when he finally did tell me a “due date” for one of his conspiracy theories, I kept that in the forefront of my brain. He said that Trump would arrest “thousands” of high-profile Democrat pedophiles engaged in child sex trafficking within a year after his first term in office started.
Well, it happened! Not really. All the right-wing news outlets vastly misrepresented an FBI sex trafficking bust that had nothing to do with Trump or “high-profile Democrats” as the one and the same massive bust of sex-trafficking high-profile Democrats that Q and Fox News and my conspiracist former friend had predicted. And it fell within the timeframe he predicted.
Of course, it was horse shit. This was no confirmation of his wacky theories. But to him, I was just being willfully blind to the obvious vindication of his prediction.
The lesson I took from that was that the fantasy they live in is far to resilient against actual reality to be phased even a little bit by any actual real-world events. And promising someone bragging rights “if such-and-such of your predictions come to pass” isn’t going to pan out for you as well as you might hope. It would require them to have a connection to reality for that to work, and they don’t.
What we believe shapes who we are. Belief can bring us salvation or destruction. But when you believe a lie for too long, the truth doesn’t set you free. It tears you apart.
Altered Carbon, s01e08, writer Brian Nelson
My neighbor told me I was gonna die in 1year after getting the first round of COVID vaccines. Pff. I wish! Still here unfortunately.
There’s new conspiracy theories popping up;
The issue with conspiracy theories nowadays though, is stigma. There are plenty of people who tell me that there’s super evil conspiracies. But calling those conspiracies makes people upset.
And not because their ideas are always unreasonable. It’s just the stigma as far as I can tell
Too darn many. Some of the family close to me has ignored their neurological decline for years. when I was a kid they used to drag me along to all sorts of crowds. It was quite the cluster####.
One that I debunked myself: one lady told me that I’d be drinking by the time I was 19. I proved her wrong, and I now realise what she did. I messaged her years later as we agreed to I would, but she did not remember me.
I now realise what she did.
What did she do?
Reverse Psychology
She got me to stay away from alcohol for a long long time. I still think I’d have regardless, but I appreciate the effort
Just the other day my friend told me that if I put TikTok on my phone the Chinese government will connect my phone to all my other devices and accounts so they can get my juicy data.
Yeah we all know they already have all of our juicy data
They could skip all that and just pay for it from the THOUSANDS of companies trying to compile a “marketing” dossier on every human alive.
Edit: So that have your data, what do they think the next step is, blackmail? Our government will be throwing you in camps for gay thought crimes soon. What can china do from way over there?
Your coworker may have small testicles.
Sorry. I tried to find out what would happen if you swallowed borax. There are several other reasons not to, but I couldn’t stop picturing a conspiracy theorist talking about chemtrails and taking a sip of ball shrinking juice. Maybe he even thinks that it’s from chemicals in the tap water and therefore increases his borax dose.
I’m afraid of chemicals “they” put up there, so I will drink chemical to counter act? Is that what people are doing?
Yup. Detoxing is necessary and totally works. Your liver and kidneys do absolutely nothing and are just there to fill up space. But remember that we are only allowed to say that something contains chemicals if we dislike it.
I have a coworker that believes every single conspiracy theory out there. Thankfully he doesn’t vote. I’ve only talked to the guy a couple times tho, so I can’t remember any of the specifics.
We should propagate a conspiracy theory that when you vote the government collected your DNA so they can eventually clone a replacement citizen and replace you. They can sneaky confuse the system only if they never vote.
Borax?? Omigod.
I work in health care, one of our delayed young patients needs urgent surgery for their condition. I called them because the surgeon’s secretary tried to contact them several times re getting them in next week without success, and the parent told me they didn’t want the surgery because they were certain that the surgeon would do “extra” procedures, which in their mind meant the patient would be given the COVID and flu vaccines while under anesthesia against their will. The doctor called them and explained that the patient needs it very badly and that nothing else would happen, so they reluctantly agreed, but they still called me yesterday fussing about this idea. I explained that there were several people in the OR for the procedure, not just the surgeon but nurses and residents and the anesthesiologist, and that none of them particularly wanted to lose their professional license doing something they didn’t consent to even if for some reason the surgeon thought that stealth vaccinating the child was a good idea.
Um, surgeons don’t consider it their job to secretly vaccinate people. In my decades of health care work I’ve only seen one technically unconsented patient because otherwise they would lose their limb and die of sepsis, and were so unable to respond to discussion about it and they had no next of kin or SDM, that the decision had to be made as life or death, because a pit bull mauled them so badly and ripped off a limb. (Sadly they lost the limb anyway). Surgeons really don’t want to do that, and they sure as hell don’t want to also stealth vaccinate crazy people.
