What else would happen in Heck?
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Nobody chews with their mouth closed, and you aren’t allowed to eat by yourself
I dunno, for me this is legit Hell.
You’re very tired nodding off and keep rereading the same page of a book over and over
Every fart is a gamble
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Welcome to Heck.
Ruled by Sathan
Rubber undies. It doesn’t really help with the mess, but the farts sound funnier
When washing your hands, water always is running into your sleeve.
And if you don’t wash your hands after using the toilet, your hands will be covered in Doritos dust for a day no matter what.
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A little bit of soap always is missed, and now your hands feel sticky after drying them.
After you sneeze, the need to burp or fart raises greatly. You also don’t have control over which one will happen.
(Or what comes out!)
As someone who’s done all three at once involuntarily, the body responds by hiccoughing.
Every meal you eat results in popcorn lodged in between your teeth regardless of what you eat
And you can never find a toothpick for an eternity of searching
You get papercuts way more often.
Also that little splinter gets under your nail way more often too.
Everybody’s really nice, but they’re super into virtuosic prog rock and won’t shut up about it.
Duuuuuude! You gotta check out Animals As Leaders tho! They’re prog metal, so they’re like, totally different than the stuff you’ve heard!
Ooh let’s talk djent. Periphery’s first album was incredible, but only the instrumental version. The vocals were annoying.
Agreed! Periphery’s vocals are too poppy for my taste. I’m more of a Meshuggah kind of guy, but I dig bands like Vola and Tesseract too.
Have y’all ever checked out Porcupine Tree? Their In Absentia days were the tops seriously
So, umm, yeah… So guys, y’all all seem really nice, but um, well, the thing is… 🤣🤣🤣
Everything glares and your eyes hurt. It is uncomfortably warm. There is a tinnitus drone on the edge of your hearing. Everyone mumbles. You constantly forget why you came into the room. Food all tastes of cardboard and your scalp itches most of the time. You get cramp in your hands and feet at inopportune times.
I am become heck forgetter of the rest of this line.
That’s called aging.
Older. You’re getting older. Heck can wait.
Wait a minute
Sounds like mondays!
You have to live with a dog that doesn’t like pets / pats.
So, a cat?
So, been in Heck long?
My cat loves pets… but he chooses when.
I’m blessed… my cats love pets AND pats, any time, anywhere, even their bellies. They’re purrfect.
Every show you ever watch will be really interesting and engaging ending on a giant season 1 cliffhanger and will be canceled never having a followup episode.
RIP “The Society”
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Slightly related, Netflix has a show called Exploding Kittens that runs vaguely on this premise.
whether 🏴☠️ is involved or not is none of my business
The lid of the pickle jar in the back of the fridge will always be loose.
any time you’re just about to fall asleep you have a 51% chance of hearing a mosquito fly past your ear
And your dreams all start with you trying to fall asleep and there’s a 51% chance of hearing a mosquito fly past your ear. If it happens, you wake up immediately
No! This is straight up Hell material, not Heck!
You can get used to anything. All of these suggestions that start with “everytime” will be changed to “sometimes.” Because it’s the hope that kills ya.
The blanket is always in the wrong direction.
Your drinking water always tastes a bit off.
Your bank makes mistakes all the time.
Every time you begin to like an item it’s mostly sold out.
Your social contacts forget what they said so they start anew often.
The weather forecasts are always way off.
When your glasses get fogged, they get fogged unevenly.
