The Assman

Humans? You mean every living thing that ever existed?

Aggressive negotiations

Never stopped him before

I’m just hanging out but thanks

Oh no! He’s hot!

Insurance ceo, the worst kind

This is what living in America does to the brain

You either need to do more or less drugs. I’m not sure which.

What in the florida

He is a lady

In Russia they just kill all the opposition leaders. It’s much cheaper that way.

Maybe I was, maybe I wasn’t.

And now I’m dropping them in the chipotle bathroom

Idiot. All I need is a Nokia with snake

Alcohol-free beer + tequila= diarrhea

I would like to name my very rare disease “a very rare disease”. It’s what Abbott and Costello would do

You guys ever just mind your own fucking business? I’m really into minding my own fucking business.

I didn’t mention a single thing about combat roles or personal danger

To fight

To be the arm

To defend

To protect

Do you not know what any of those terms mean

You know most enlisted aren’t in combat roles right? My brother did ten years behind a desk, ended up with an awesome career and got to travel the world for free.

Selfish bastard didn’t get milady any milk