Rough translation with surely a lot of mistakes:

I have paranoid shizophrenia!

I see bread! (red -> bread and the bread is a character from German kids TV)

Go Away!

That Guy has a Nutri-Score of “Opfer”. (Opfer means victim and is used as an insult, Nutri-Score is a nutritional score printed on product packaging in super markets)

That’s why talking to therapist Dr. Oetker (Dr. Oetker is a brand that makes food stuff like cake mix)

Dude, you don’t have health insurance. Leave/Fuck off you freeloader!

Wecome to the psychiatric institute Hanover!

Here we have gothic women, that make even a male duck horny.

We also have board games! Chocolate-Bonobos (The real name is bonbon not bonobo which means candy) and radio broadcast recievers that play the best Schlager hit songs.

Schlager song plays

Goosebumps!

These are my friends!

Mario Kart (Mario Barth is a German “comedian”)

What does the XX chromosome say? I want to buy shoes!

And the one shy girl with the manga. My little Duckling! Damn

Always remember, there is help for you out there!

Stares at mirror

Spiegel TV (Spiegel is a german news magazine, the name means mirror)

Guess where I laid a Surprise Egg (Chocolate egg with a toy inside)

THE DUCK DOES NOT HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE! I CANNOT BE BOTHERED WITH THE “AMPEL” ANYMORE! (Ampel = traffic light, it’s the name of the coalition government consisting of Social democrats (red), Free Democrats (yellow) and the Green Party)

My grandma once gifted me volume 21 of a manga I didn’t even own a single volume of. All she knew was that I like that japanese comic thing so she bought a random one at the book store.

In Japanese a thermos bottle is called 魔法瓶/Mahoubin, which literally translated means magic bottle.

Eww no, I definitely don’t want them to take any pointers from big tech. Their anti-spam methods are way too restrictive and invasive to your privacy. I don’t want to give my phone number to websites just to sign up. And I cannot even view Youtube videos or Instagram posts because they are blocking the IPv6 address of my 6in4 tunnel which I need because my ISP doesn’t have IPv6 yet. I have to sign in to “confirm you are not a bot”.