Ok Lemmings look, I love life and I love my family, so I’d hate to have to blow my fucking brains out. So what’s another strategy for tuning out this incessant lava chicken?
Alternatively, does anyone have a time machine and enough money to convince Jack Black to not do the Minecraft movie?
Start singing baby shark song, or what did the fox say. Expand his repetuar
Repetaur sounds like a great fictional dinosaur to add to my son’s repertoire.
Lol, thanks I needed to confirm that dinosaur name
La la la lava!
Ch ch ch chicken!
Steve’s Lava Chicken, yeah it’s tasty as hell
Ooh mamacita, now you’re ringin’ the bell!
Crispy and juicy, now you’re havin’ a snack
Record it from all angles at all opportunities and play the video at their wedding. Until then, sustain yourself on the antici
spoiler
pation.
That is some damn fine dadding right there. I think this is a perfect plan.
Genuine question - why is that deemed a good answer? I’d expect an actual solution for a child to be more apropriate than humiliating an adult later in life. Like the suggestions telling to start singing it yourself, wrongly, seem much more effective and appropriate to me.
Full disclosure tho: Not a parent and no plans to ever be one
The suggestion and response are both meant humorously. It clearly isn’t actually a good answer because it doesn’t actually solve the problem, except in some passive-agressive far-off-in-the-future way.
Ah that’s on me missing the clue then, apologies. Though in my defense, there are parents that do stuff like this.
Sink enough money into lava chicken paraphernalia for the child to instantly lose all interest in it.
You deafen yourself with a sharp pencil. Only way.
Oh my gosh, your comment made me sick.
I mean really, who in their right mind would even consider that? Personally I can’t even imagine just wasting a perfectly good pencil. Please be a responsible adult and use a fork instead (in case you can’t fit the fork into your ear canal you might wanna widen it with a spoon first. Btw. spoons are the goto in case your ability to see is bothering you too)
Who’s wasting it? Just wipe it off with a paper towel and you can use it on your crossword!
Why would you waste perfectly fine food by wiping it off with a towel? Kids in africa can surely still eat that!
Also just in case your crossword puzzle starts talking to you: no it didn’t (they’re not actually sentient, but can still feel pain of course). And please for the love of god, don’t ask it about it’s opinion on skin colors
Depending on your childs age and your bond maybe just tell them you don’t like the song? Might just work for some children, if they’re able to empathize with you (should be doable for most. Empathy can be taught!)
Noise canceling earbuds/a headset might be an option too (for you, or your child. Doesn’t really matter)
Depending on your child’s age and your bond you could also simply get rid of the child.
Oh man… That’s the dream. I think I’ve missed my window for that though, at this point the wife is pretty committed to keeping him.
Pro gamer move here!
Sounds like a lot of work, unless you got a set of stairs and a shovel
Think of all the future effort it’ll save, though.
Depending on how cool you are maybe if you start singing it they’ll stop
that’s what they™ want you to do
Right!
Nice try son.
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I don’t wanna sound old here, but I finally watched that thing a couple days ago and boy did I feel my age there. Clearly I’ve lived long enough that a whole movie failed to connect with me on any level. I mean it has Jack Black in it and I adore him. I guess what I’m saying is I have no idea how to fix your kid because they’re a different people now.
However , the classic old group defense against young slang is taking it up and enthusiastically using it wrong. So enjoy your hot poultry song.
Do you play Minecraft?
I have yet to watch it but i assume there is very little to connect with if you don’t?
Depending on how old your kids are and if you are not already playing, playing on a local server together is great family time and can provide situations for real bonding aswell as real world educational discussions.
It has very little to connect with even if you do play minecraft. If you watch youtubers play minecraft, on the other hand, it’s probably perfect.
It’s basically a gen Alpha (maybe Z at a stretch) cringe comedy movie more than a minecraft movie. That’s mostly just the setting.
His uncle took him to see the movie (a real bullet dodged for me).
I saw the honest trailer for it and decided it was exactly as much of the movie as I needed to see.
It is not a good movie, but my kids enjoyed it, so I got some vicarious pleasure out of the experience. I wouldn’t watch it on my own.
Yeah same. It was our first theater experience together and we had a blast. The movie is aggressively mediocre although it does have a few moments.
I don’t know why people dislike it so much other than the girl and her brother doing a terrible job at being relatable or authentic. I thought Jack Black and Jason Momoa did a great job and I’m not even a fan of Momoa.
Agreed. It was a fine example of a kid movie with kid actors. If you go in with low expectations, you probably won’t be disappointed.
I put it on for myself(42) the other day it took all my will to not turn it off 3 mins in, I broke by 25 mins and turned it off. I then mocked my buddy who said it wasn’t bad(he has 2 boys in prime Minecraft movie age).
I have an 18 month old girl with another on the way, not looking forward to whatever her equivalent frozen/Minecraft movie is. But I have also sung more wheels on the bus than I can stand.
I sat through a couple of the Paw Patrol movies when my guys were younger. It helps if you can find a way to appreciate them for what they are.
Or sleep. I slept through the Mario movie and I think that made it way better.
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just let it go
Brutal…
Steady now, my generation got through the Macarena, you’ll get through this. Nice deep breaths… in… out…
And MmmBop (which tbh hits these days in a very sad sad way)
In a mmmbop it really is gone
Return to sender
Sue him. Or record him, upload to Youtube and threaten to copyright strike him.
Have them watch too many cooks.
It takes a lot to make a stew
A pinch of salt and laughter too
Oh shit… I don’t think he’s ready for that level of weird…
Hah, now I just want to know what he’d think of it.















