Ok Lemmings look, I love life and I love my family, so I’d hate to have to blow my fucking brains out. So what’s another strategy for tuning out this incessant lava chicken?

Alternatively, does anyone have a time machine and enough money to convince Jack Black to not do the Minecraft movie?

  • Lumidaub@feddit.org
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    1 year ago

    Record it from all angles at all opportunities and play the video at their wedding. Until then, sustain yourself on the antici

    spoiler

    pation.

      • Blubber28@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Genuine question - why is that deemed a good answer? I’d expect an actual solution for a child to be more apropriate than humiliating an adult later in life. Like the suggestions telling to start singing it yourself, wrongly, seem much more effective and appropriate to me.

        Full disclosure tho: Not a parent and no plans to ever be one

        • DaPorkchop_ [any]@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          The suggestion and response are both meant humorously. It clearly isn’t actually a good answer because it doesn’t actually solve the problem, except in some passive-agressive far-off-in-the-future way.

          • Blubber28@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Ah that’s on me missing the clue then, apologies. Though in my defense, there are parents that do stuff like this.

  • lemmyng@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    Sink enough money into lava chicken paraphernalia for the child to instantly lose all interest in it.

    • Ace! _SL/S@ani.social
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      1 year ago

      Oh my gosh, your comment made me sick.

      I mean really, who in their right mind would even consider that? Personally I can’t even imagine just wasting a perfectly good pencil. Please be a responsible adult and use a fork instead (in case you can’t fit the fork into your ear canal you might wanna widen it with a spoon first. Btw. spoons are the goto in case your ability to see is bothering you too)

        • Ace! _SL/S@ani.social
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          1 year ago

          Why would you waste perfectly fine food by wiping it off with a towel? Kids in africa can surely still eat that!

          Also just in case your crossword puzzle starts talking to you: no it didn’t (they’re not actually sentient, but can still feel pain of course). And please for the love of god, don’t ask it about it’s opinion on skin colors

  • Ace! _SL/S@ani.social
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    1 year ago

    Depending on your childs age and your bond maybe just tell them you don’t like the song? Might just work for some children, if they’re able to empathize with you (should be doable for most. Empathy can be taught!)

    Noise canceling earbuds/a headset might be an option too (for you, or your child. Doesn’t really matter)

  • Idontevenknowanymore@mander.xyz
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    1 year ago

    I don’t wanna sound old here, but I finally watched that thing a couple days ago and boy did I feel my age there. Clearly I’ve lived long enough that a whole movie failed to connect with me on any level. I mean it has Jack Black in it and I adore him. I guess what I’m saying is I have no idea how to fix your kid because they’re a different people now.

    However , the classic old group defense against young slang is taking it up and enthusiastically using it wrong. So enjoy your hot poultry song.

    • webghost0101@sopuli.xyz
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      1 year ago

      Do you play Minecraft?

      I have yet to watch it but i assume there is very little to connect with if you don’t?

      Depending on how old your kids are and if you are not already playing, playing on a local server together is great family time and can provide situations for real bonding aswell as real world educational discussions.

      • Zorque@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        It has very little to connect with even if you do play minecraft. If you watch youtubers play minecraft, on the other hand, it’s probably perfect.

        It’s basically a gen Alpha (maybe Z at a stretch) cringe comedy movie more than a minecraft movie. That’s mostly just the setting.

    • sbv@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      It is not a good movie, but my kids enjoyed it, so I got some vicarious pleasure out of the experience. I wouldn’t watch it on my own.

      • Zos_Kia@lemmynsfw.com
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        1 year ago

        Yeah same. It was our first theater experience together and we had a blast. The movie is aggressively mediocre although it does have a few moments.

      • CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        I don’t know why people dislike it so much other than the girl and her brother doing a terrible job at being relatable or authentic. I thought Jack Black and Jason Momoa did a great job and I’m not even a fan of Momoa.

        • sbv@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Agreed. It was a fine example of a kid movie with kid actors. If you go in with low expectations, you probably won’t be disappointed.

      • Zannsolo@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I put it on for myself(42) the other day it took all my will to not turn it off 3 mins in, I broke by 25 mins and turned it off. I then mocked my buddy who said it wasn’t bad(he has 2 boys in prime Minecraft movie age).

        I have an 18 month old girl with another on the way, not looking forward to whatever her equivalent frozen/Minecraft movie is. But I have also sung more wheels on the bus than I can stand.

        • sbv@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          I sat through a couple of the Paw Patrol movies when my guys were younger. It helps if you can find a way to appreciate them for what they are.

          Or sleep. I slept through the Mario movie and I think that made it way better.