One that always annoyed me is when it is around the holidays, when stores advertise gifts for men. They always assume a guy is into toilet humor, beer humor, assuming they’re a lumberjack who needs to survive out in the wilderness, are into bbq-ing all of the time so gotta have those available all year around for some reason.
Even when I used to have identified myself as a guy, I never once fit into any of those traits. Just because guys grow beards, doesn’t always mean they’re chopping wood somewhere and always wearing plaid.
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What you’re describing sounds more like marketing than stereotypes.
Enough men fit into these category that advertising this way works. So that won’t stop.
They are selling them because people buy them. E.g. I’m a guy, and I’m into toilet and beer humor. Trans/non binary/etc guys are a minority, and im pretty sure you can find your stuff somewhere, it’s not banned, but capitalism says they have to advertise to the majority to make the most profits.
I don’t care about football, but I know a lot of people do, so I don’t get annoyed by other people having different taste and interest than me.
I fit into that stereotype. I’m still doing no shave November 2014, I hunt and fish and like to BBQ anything I catch while having a beer.
does no shave also mean no trim? scissors?
It would probably contain those words if that is what it meant.
No shave means no shave.
sorry, didnt mean to make you delete your account
🧟♂️
fediverse undeadz!
Too good for fart jokes? 😂
A wise woman once told me, “If you don’t enjoy farts you’ll have less joy in your life but the same number of farts.”
Every one of them
That if a woman is into stereotypically feminine things she must be dumb and shallow. Just cause I love the bimbo aesthetic doesn’t mean I can’t also be into “serious, deep” stuff like science, tech, politics, academia, etc.
As a teenager I never wore dresses, skirts or nail polish because I didn’t want to be seen as a girly girl. I was into science and books and that didn’t seem to fit the vibes.
I’m glad that I figured out in my twenties that being in a male-dominated tech field doesn’t require you to dress masculine or wear nerd shirts. If you’re into that, that’s great, but it’s also okay to wear dresses or put on make up if you work as an engineer or a software developer.
Woman does normal thing dressed as woman.
“OMFG do we really to sexualize normal thing?!?”
I mean, to be fair, a lot of women’s clothing is geared to be sexually attractive. Just because it’s been normalized doesn’t make it untrue. Something can be normal and sexualized.
Or do you think there’s a practical, unsexy benefit of women’s pants having tinyass pockets and being skin tight?
Not that I agree with their complaints. I’m totally fine with people dressing how they want, unless it’s dragging their bare unwiped ass all over the furniture.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wearing clothes that fit well and makes you look good, but it will be judged.
On the internet in general and specifically on YouTube, it’s difficult for handsome people to do anything at all without being accused of doing normal stuff while being attractive just to increase monetization.
It’s a weird kind of gate keeping, but I do understand it. There are definitely channels that only exist for that reason, and it might be annoying to see your favorite topic being used by someone who ought to be on OnlyFans instead. However, it doesn’t actually take anything away from anyone, so it’s really just a ‘crabs in a bucket’ mentality, where nobody are allowed to stand out.
Yea, agreed. Anyone complaining about something being too attractive is really just advertizing their own insecurity and/or lack of self control.
Who the fuck wants an ugly environment?!
To be fair, she did explicitly refer to the bimbo aesthetic. That’s not just dressing “like a woman”, it’s a pretty objectively sexualized aesthetic. Not that what you’re saying doesn’t also happen.
Men don’t cry or ahow emotions. Women can’t drive. Women belong in the kitchen. A man having many partners is the goat. A woman having many partners is a whore. A woman wearing “sexy” clothes wants the attention of men and is partially responsible should a man overstep his boundries. Blonde women are stupid. The men are the bread winners. Househusbands are “beta”-man. Men have to pay for the date. Men getting beaten by a their partner are weak and deserved it. Women getting beat by their partner is an exeption. Making a sexist joke is harmless. Feminism is bad for men and only helps women take away the power of men. The patriachial order is good for all men.
Sooo, this are all the cringe takes I could come up with real fast. There are many more, but I don’t want to write and essay here.
I’ve noticed that when you want a question answered it’s best to put your own answer in a comment and let the post only be describing or clarifying the question. When you put a question and your answer together in the post, the question reads more rhetorical since you’ve already given “the answer”, and your answer will be what people discuss rather than giving their own answers.
My sexist stereotype that needs to stop is that men are not good with kids, or unsafe.
I want to see more men playing with kids, being handed strangers kids to hold at gatherings, men hugging and cuddling kids. It’s no more suspicious or odd for a man to enjoy and appreciate and be caring with children (not just his own) than it is for a woman.
I have no qualms asking a strange child if they want help if I see them struggling (seeming lost, trying to reach something, scared of the escalator, whatever), and I want men to feel equally comfortable stepping in without being afraid of what people might think they’re up to… Because people need to stop thinking men are up to something when they are clearly trying to have a positive impact.
This is one thing that I’m pretty self conscious about. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve spent a lot of time on the internet and see lots of actual creeps on there but it’s often on my mind in public to try not to come off as a creep. The only exception is with my nieces or nephew, I’ll be dammed if someone’s going to accuse me of something because I’m playing with them or keeping an eye on them in public, but outside of that, I’m a single guy in his 30s and that don’t look good, so I keep to myself.
Actually, as I was typing this out I remembered the guy that I saw while I was with my nieces and their parents waiting for some food at a fast food place a few months back. The place was busy so we were all there for a while and this old guy comes up nearby, waits for a while, then complains out loud to us. Ok, that’s normal, but then he just hangs out for a while close to the kids. After we get the last of our food as the youngest is getting off of a stool, he reaches out to help her off, holding her under the arms. That type of situation is exactly what I try to avoid. Maybe he was harmless and thought she needed a hand, that for some reason the three adults she knew couldn’t provide, but keep your hands off the kid, we don’t know you. (She was not struggling to get off the stool)
I have friends (men) working in a heavily women work. Every times there’s a minor scratch or handwork to do they’re called. It’s annoying, everyone know how to operate a screwdriver
Men are just big children.
The other day at work, a woman said “I have three children. And a husband, so I guess three and a half children.”
Don’t usually see that stereotype in the wild.
I don’t want people to give up joy and fun things, but the idea that men are just irresponsible and their wife has to also be their responsible mother is sad.
Edit: typo
Bonus points if it’s, “He’s childish because he’s so emotional.”
And then we wonder why men are closed off emotionally.
It’s funny because the dynamic in my relationship is flipped and I can relate more to women’s complaints about mental load, cooking/household, malicious incompetence, communication, etc so this one always stands out when I come across it.
It’s not a stereotype if it’s true, though! /s
On a more serious note, coming from an immigrant family, you can see it very clearly in a lot of those old Eurpoean cultures (Portugal, spain, etc…) The men work, the women (seem) subservient, but honestly, without them, their husbands are absolutely useless at bills, banking, groceries, literally anything that isn’t getting up and going to work to make money.
Most men would absolutely fall apart without their wives because while they can dress for themselves, they sure as hell can’t shop for themselves, etc…
I’m not saying that that’st he modern convention. It isn’t at all. It’s changing. But there’s still a tonne of older women who come in and (half-jokingly) have to buy a bunch of premade meals for their husband because she has to go on the road for a few days and he is useless for that sort of stuff on his own.
Unfortunately that’s a stereotype that holds up way more often than it should. Women often end up taking on a huge domestic load and/or caretaker load in a household, even if both she and her husband are working outside the home.
There are couples that never fall into this or that actively try to balance domestic and caretaking activities. One set of tools I know about is “Fair Play”.
Only because the far right wing conservative shitlords like Shapiro,
Kirk, Chowderhead, and Walsh et. al. have been brainwashing guys into taking pride in having no idea how to take care of themselves. They literally take pride in not knowing how to do laundry, cook, or many other domestic tasks…That definitely amplifies the problem, but this isn’t a new problem.
Here’s a study by Pew Research that shows this (data collected from 2016 to 2021).
Here’s a paper that attempts to estimate how much time women have historically spent on “home production” (unpaid work that benefits the household, like cleaning, caretaking, etc). The estimates are based on data from 1900 to the 2000s.
On page 27, Table 6A shows employed, married women haven’t seen a significant reduction in domestic work.
Table 7 shows data for men, but it’s not clear which are married (or sharing household tasks with a woman in some other way). That table shows employed men are taking on much more domestic work than a hundred years ago, but single employed women spend 3 hours more a week while married employed women spent 10+ hours more per week.
https://econweb.ucsd.edu/~vramey/research/Home_Production_published.pdf
The thing i don’t get is why do women put up with it?
I think some of it boils down to different standards, generally the neater/cleaner person will expect the other person to change their behaviour. When I hear people moaning about significant others doing nothing I do think that it takes both people to allow it. Most people will live together for a while before marriage/kids so you have no excuse to complain if you know what they’re like and still marry etcWhen women don’t put up with it en masse you get massive waves of men threatening women. That’s a big part of the whole gen Z gender war thing.
Threaten to do what?
If women don’t put up with it en masse then there is fuck all men can do about it. Mass action is how things change
Mass violence. The tate bs comes from this. The incel mass shootings come from this. Hell the polytechnique shooting was in conversation with this. Men who can’t get laid because women decide men aren’t worth the effort sometimes loudly talk online about how they’re considering rape about it. And that’s not talking about the pushes towards misogynistic politicians, like how young American men who can’t get laid are increasingly opposing women’s suffrage.
For a good example of all of it look at the epidemic of gendered violence in South Korea.
The thing i don’t get is why do women put up with it?
Many reasons.
Some people are taught gender essentialism from a young age. Women are like this, men are like that, and there’s no way to change it. It’s just nature (or God) that women clean and take care of the house, and men go out and hunt.
Many boys are socialized from a young age not to cook or clean. Many girls are taught that that’s what they do. Have you seen this in your life? A family gathering, where the boys run off to play and the women and girls stick around to clean up? Children learn from what they see and what they’re taught.
It’s only recently that women had any shot at financial independence. Women weren’t guaranteed the right to open a bank account until 1974, in the US. Sexual discrimination is a problem with finding a career to pay one’s own way. From that, one can infer that some women “put up with” shitty men, because the alternative is destitution.
Some women may believe that changing it is just too much work- it’s not an immutable nor innate property of men that they don’t cook or clean or know anything about the children, but changing that would be an overwhelming amount of work. If the man’s not interested in changing anything, it’s even more daunting, and may damage the relationship.
Also some men get violent if they feel threatened, insulted, or hungry.
These are just some things I’ve read or women have talked to me about. I’m a dude doing the best I can. Talk to the women in your life (but don’t make them teach you a whole seminar for free, heh.)
Some women may believe that changing it is just too much work- it’s not an immutable nor innate property of men that they don’t cook or clean or know anything about the children, but changing that would be an overwhelming amount of work. If the man’s not interested in changing anything, it’s even more daunting, and may damage the relationship
That’s what I mean though. Why stay or care about damaging the relationship? Sunk cost fallacy. Some times a hard choice needs to be made. This choice should be made before children/mortgages etc. There’s the old stereotype of men enter a relationship thinking the women wont change and women enter a relationship hoping the man will.
Well, sunk cost fallacy is extremely common.
But also people don’t have perfect knowledge. And people change, and change at different rates.
Imagine a couple that meets when they’re both pretty immature in their 20s. They have fun and fall in love. Then they buy a home together, and the woman slowly realizes she’s matured into an adult role while the husband is still basically the 20 year old bro. Would you casually suggest burning the whole thing down? Finding a new relationship in your mid 30s, especially if you want kids, when there’s no guarantee the new person will be any better, is daunting.
What if they’re not financially independent?
It’s easy to sit back and tell people how to behave in the abstract, but real situations aren’t always so obvious.
That men always want sex with anyone at any time, and if they don’t that means there’s something wrong with them.
I’m on the far end of this spectrum, and I’d argue that there’s definitely something wrong with me, but it’s a curious issue in the sense that it only affects me negatively when someone else is bothered by it. You don’t really miss sex when you have no desire for it. It’s actually kind of a superpower too at times. I feel more free than many of my peers whose minds are constantly occupied with chasing sex.
As desires go, it certainly takes up an awful lot of time and energy that can be put to other uses.
I didn’t think I could ever be like this until I took a long break and realized, “Uh oh. This is working WAY TOO WELL.” Now I’m like 5-6 years in and I used to wonder how I’d go even a month or two without sex.
Husband Dumb; wife like shopping and naggs Boys being violent being considered “okay” Boys in theater are into guys. I mean i may be that but not everyone!
Even when I used to have identified myself as a guy, I never once fit into any of those traits.
I don’t think you should be too surprised to have not fallen into male dominated stereotypes when you are part of a minority.
I recently became aware of the “performative male” stereotype. Basically, if you’re a guy who doesn’t dress the way most men dress and you like to read books in public, you’re just “performing” in order to attract women.
I think it’s the whole anti-intellectualism aspect of the stereotype that irks me the most (it being shameful somehow for a guy to read).
In some cases Tik-Tokers are filming guys just sitting alone at like a Starbucks reading a book, bothering nobody, and acting like they caught a predator.
It reminds me of that old Bill Hicks anecdote where he’s at a diner in the deep south reading a book, and some dude exclaims “looks we got a reader!” as if it were something peculiar.
Here’s a good critique of it if you’re OOTL https://youtube.com/watch?v=b3jIgdbVjr4
I just recently discovered that channel and really like it. People on lemmy have great taste lmao.
I misread the topic and thought this was about the “sexiest stereotypes” like a woman smart woman talking about a topic she’s passionate about or a man that frees trapped wildlife.
I get annoyed when I order a cocktail or a vegetarian dish at a restaurant and they put it in front of my wife.
Sometimes I want a veggie filled meal, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to pass up a cocktail because it’s not “manly”.
I have scotch at home, and if I’m buying a steak it’s going to be from a high quality restaurant. I hate overpaying for steak that I can cook better at home.
So I had a similar experience. I was a vegetarian, I don’t like coffee, I don’t drink alcohol.
First the waiter put the wine in front of me and the soda in front of my wife.
Then I got the meat and she the veggie dish.
Then finally she got the white tea and I the coffee.
Lol happens to me all the time, I only drink fruity or sweet alcoholic beverages and my wife loves beer and whiskey.
Couple weeks ago we were out with some work friends and I ordered a “Trophy Wife” and it came with a flower in it and everything lmao (tasted fantastic) and one of the guys we were with (who is gay even) made a comment about my prissy drink lmao. He was doing it in jest but like… Why shouldn’t I like things that taste good? XD
I can sort of relate. I’m fat as fuck, but I really like salads and veggies. When I go out to eat, my (much smaller) partner will order like a steak and potatoes, and I might order like a chicken cobb salad, not because I’m dieting, but I because I really wanted a dinner salad. And like half the time they give the salad to my partner and give me the steak.
My wife is a huge prime rib fan. Invariably, the waiter gives me the prime rib, and my wife the salmon.
