Please don’t tell me “see a therapist” I know that already.
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You can’t argue a person out of an irrational view.
Explaining brain chemistry and how dopamine works won’t do it.
A belief like that is a way of signalling membership in an identity that the individual thinks benefits them. It’s unlikely to change until that identity stops looking beneficial.
My rebuttal is that your mom’s a bitch and there’s no reason to pay attention to anything she says.
Right? If I had a mom like that I’d be depressed too.
Oh wait, I did, and I was.
Confirmed. Tagged this person before, I’ve noticed they often comment about some fucked up shit their mom says. But they’re young and probably not able to escape it yet unfortunately :/
Damn right.
Do you mean deserve instead of serve?
Cant type correctly in the middle of getting yelled at and I was desparate for a place to vent.
No problem
Homie, what you deserve is ‘better’. I feel for you
She might just think waiters and waitresses are scumbags. Though even if they meant deserve, she probably still thinks that. Man, what an absolute hangnail she is.
From my experience, people who say this either highly value themselves or are/were depressed and hate(d) themselves for it.
Don’t waste too much time trying to change their mind and just keep it in mind the next time they say something.
Can’t ban chemtrails but you can reduce contrails which play a weirdly large part in warming up the planet irrespective of fuel consumed.
Just putting the word out for an underrated climate thingy.
I think I remember something about the clouds caused by massive container ships going away because they outlawed to really cheap crude oil their engines used. But the clouds actually had a cooling effect on the plant because the clouds reflected more light than the ocean. So some people are experimenting with spraying salt water into the air from these ships so the salt will create nucleation points for the clouds.
All this to say is coulds good, fossil fuels bad.
Value is a superficial, arbitrary concept. Their value view is different from other people’s. Zoom out far enough, and you can argue that nothing has value. Look around, and you can attribute value to many things, countless times.
So, value to whom and in whose eyes? They can’t find value to and for others.
Depression is not just an excuse for laziness.
You cannot logically rebut a bad worldview. Plant seeds of doubt, protect yourself, and move on.
I think I’ve said this before to you a few weeks ago, and I totally understand that it’s easier said than done to cut family off, but your family are negative influences in your life and on your psyche, and you should be ignoring their bullshit and get away from them.
Sorry your family still sucks, all I can offer are platitudes I’m afraid.
To answer your question though, I think a good, solid “Shit up, shit-bagel, you wouldn’t have shit if it weren’t for me and no amount of denial on your part can change facts.” and walk away/block/slam the door.
Value is a loaded term here.
If, as I assume, she means “economic” value — in a twisted, Judeo-Christian, colonialist, capitalist, explotative system — then, sure, value is assigned to money and only the top 0.001% of earners “have value”. Bully to the 99.999% of people on Earth who spend their lives delivering that value to the top. I hazard the guess your mom is one of those people.
Also, loaded into that term, if she has among her moral values those the western, chauvinistic, Biblical moral set, I might be inclined to question whether she lives up to her own values of charity, humility, and acceptance.
What everyone has is an “intrinsic” value; a unique set of experiences and gifts that has never existed before in the universe and never will again. We are here to delight in each other’s presence and potential. This doesn’t do much for the bottom line… until it does.
Collaboration on shared goals, building sustainable practices, and ensuring plenty for all are among humanity’s highest intrinsic, economic, and moral functions. Previously, I said that the values system your mom probably considers correct is twisted; that’s because in this system the highest functions are immense power, immediate profit, and absolute exploitation. These are ignored or invisible to most.
Your mom’s blindness and/or ignorance is what makes her tragically wrong.
"OK, Boomer. "
So the Nazi stance, basically.
Honestly I’ll take that over people who say depresses/disabled people have rights, but also don’t want to actually provide any kind of means for them to exist.
I’m sorry you have to deal with that sort of toxicity in your family. There is no good rebuttal because it just seems like a lack of empathy, no one can make her care.
I’m sure that’s rough for you. Wishing you happy holidays despite this callus friction. 💜❤️♥️😘
I’d tell them to shut the fuck up and not to speak that way about people in my presence.
My parents try to bait me into silly and shitty discussions like this, usually prompted by some conservative bullshit they saw on their preferred news program, and I just very simply say: “We can’t discuss this because it is going to make me hate you.” That’s been enough to put an end to it for me.
By the way your mom describes depression, it’s obvious she doesn’t understand what it actually is. She likely thinks depressed people simply sleep all day and feel sad. I would start by asking her to define the terms she’s using, have her define depression and value, then ask what she believes laziness means. The way she frames this suggests she’s repeating something she heard rather than expressing a considered worldview. It probably isn’t her own position; she’s just agreeing with it. Ask her what she actually believes, assuming she has a coherent position at all. Finally, close the discussion by asking whether she has actually read the Bible from front to back. That question usually ends the conversation.
