All y’all are picking dick.
But the correct answer is the balls. Need something more durable and with a faster reload time.
balls
Instructions Unclear, accidentally became leader of Ukraine.
How many times a day do you need to jerk off?!
You’ll be limited by shaft resilience before reload time, especially over multi-day operations.
Then you want to upgrade your prostate, not balls.
that’s okay my homies can hook me up with a reload
Careful with that, you probably wouldn’t want to end up in a StuG III Ausf B situation
rubbing a monkey’s paw
Oh no! I didn’t realize I was asking for Nazi balls!
I’d upgrade my ass so that I didn’t need to shit, it just like teleported the poop somewhere
Absolutely no way, finishing a good poo is such a relief.
You can still do it, just anywhere.
Deafinitly one of the choices
Definitely my spine. There’s a reason basically anyone who has worked in the trades for a while has a fucked up back. It would be nice to avoid my impending back problems.
Is it a form problem?
Classic.
I’d upgrade my balls so that they aren’t vulnerable when being attacked. That way I can steal Bobby Hill’s purse and get away with it.
Skeletal structure.
This implies stronger bones and stronger joints. With a stronger framework to hold your muscles, you get a sturdier body.
Can we pick the nature of the upgrade? I want to pee champagne
From now on you’re french
Merde!
And you can only pee in the champagne region of France.
Otherwise it’s only called sparkling piss.
Can I just say “my immune system”? That’d prevent all kinds of diseases and make you cancer proof!
not an organ and having a stronger immune system would kill you
Post didn’t say stronger it said upgrade. And it wouldn’t be an upgrade if it killed me!
My brain, i hate being neurodivergent it’d be so great to just fOCUSSS
Me too with brain, I hate not being able to socialize.
The only upgrade I want is to be able to control the hyperfocus
monkey’s paw curls
When a monkey’s paw’s last wish is spent, you have a monkey’s fist.
I’d upgrade the depression away from my brain and give myself the ability for hyperfocus at will and to turn off sensory issues. Taking the autism and ADHD away altogether would leave me a different human, idk that almost feels like dying a little bit, or being lobotomized. Wouldn’t want to lose a part of my brain that makes me me. But super valid to want to be neurotypical!
Thinking about it, if it counts as an organ, idk if I wouldn’t rather change my immune system to stop attacking healthy tissue and get better at attacking viruses instead. Tough choice.
Aren’t those 3 things though?
It’s funny, there’s a local program where people can anonymously ask adults and kids with various handicaps questions they wouldn’t dare ask them directly and “would you rather not have it” is always one of them. The adults always dodge the question by saying that it’s not as bad as it seems and so on and then the kids always reply like you did “I would much rather not have any issues!”
The adults: I learned to live with it and now it became part of my identity
The kids: this sucks! everyone’s mean to me and the world makes no sense!
Fuck. I felt seen/attacked by that on both counts.
Right?!
Considering what it means to be “normal” around me, I’d rather be divergent.
But then again, I manage to focus well enough.
deleted by creator
I’d like to upgrade my penis into super penis, two barrels, break action instead of the pump action, then I’ll create a new sex act called “Quakeing”, where you strafe around your sexual partner while constantly ejaculating on them with your super penis.
You want a break action penis, so you have to manually reload every couple of shots? Nah, you want belt fed, just hold the trigger and go!
Welp, that’s enough internet for today
Having a bigger dick is overrated. Great for fantasy, but very impractical.
I’d upgrade my lungs to be better filters and oxygenate my blood. My immune system to fight diseases my efficiently (turn it into a scalpel rather than a cluster-nuke). My brain to retain it’s learning capabilities well into my later years. Completely overhaul my metabolism so that I won’t have to do heavy exercise to get good muscles (really, all that exercise just exists to make one chemical reaction happen).
After that, then, only then, might I consider doing something with my dick. Though perhaps more with my balls, so I can just switch off the reproductive capabilities to ensure safe sex.
It said one organ, you went on a shopping spree haha.
Hey, flesh is weak! :V
From the moment I understood
I want my tits to be able to shoot lasers at will, it’d be cool.
You mean something like this?
Since when is a dick an organ?
Reproductive organ
